Delayed Album Review: “Unleashed”

Don’t get too comfortable adult rappers with chest hair and responsibilities, it looks like 2003 is going to be quite the year for Lil Bow Wow. The teen sensation scoots back on the scene with his new release “Unleashed” which promises to really urge the question, “How much is $14.99 anyway?”

After abandoning his previous record label, and his first name “Lil”, listeners are meeting a new, more rabie heavy Bow Wow. This isn’t your girlfriend’s little sister’s kitten’s hip hop anymore. With songs about picking girls up at the mall, and learning to drive, it’s like you can actually hear his testicles dropping mid-album. This guy has become plain dangerous. I mean, look at the album cover. It’s the epitome of cool. He is literally throwing up neutral gang signs in front of an explosion! It’s like he’s saying, “Hey explosion, you can’t wear those colors in my neighborhood.” And we’re all sitting back like, “What is he crazy?!” No, he’s no crazy, just unleashed. 

Bow Wow’s lyrics have matured quite a bit since his last studio release. For instance, take his impressive use of consonance in the song “Get It Poppin’”. 

“B Wizzle, Swizzle, is you crazy baby? I’m rain, them boys just drizzle.”

Wooooaaahhhh!!!! Did this guy just compare himself to a moderate storm??? You damn right he did, and he meant every word.

Similarly, check out his ferocious shoutout to a children’s network in the song “I Can’t Lose”.

“You think it’s easy don’t ya? wanna be Weezy don’t ya? I’m a performer homie, you just take it easy won’t ya. From Nickelodeon, Source to BET, I’m approaching the podium folks is voting for me.”

That’ll show them Bow Wow. No way they treat you like a rapper that can’t buy his own cigarettes now.

And for those of you that miss the more sensitive Bow Wow, don’t fret, he still has a number of classic tracks for you to color rainbows to. “Hey Little Momma” and “My Baby” are some of the most orgasmic songs on the album; especially for anyone who hasn’t learned how the female orgasm works.

From start to finish “Unleashed” proves to be every high school students favorite thing to get yelled at for playing too loud after 9pm. The new Bow Wow has truly been unleashed, and we’ve all found something else to be thankful for this year.